The First Rule of Fight Club...

It has been more than two weeks since the fisticuffs erupted between Assemblywoman Marcia Karrow of Flemington and Raritan Township Committeewoman Chris Harcar on the Sunday evening before the June 5th primary. The Hunterdon County Republican Party was running phone banks at the Kuhl Corporation when the incident happened.

The issue is being investigated by the County Prosecutor’s office, and probed by top newspaper reporters throughout the state. Although all other primary races in the state have been settled by the will of the people, there is still no clear winner in this match as of yet.

“ The whole thing is surreal…if this goes on much longer, the Court should declare a no-contest, and demand a new brawl. The people deserve better than that and should have a clear winner,” said Mayor Peter “Petey” McPeters of Jersey Shore, NJ. McPeters is a fictious character and does not really understand any New Jersey governmental issues anyway. “I don’t care if I don’t exist, I think this whole fight thing is just nuts. Karrow and Harcar should shake hands like men and get it over with," continued McPeters.

There is precedent for courts calling for special elections to settle these issues. In Flemington, Democratic Councilman Mark Legato won a special election over his Republican opponent in February. And in May in Morris Township, Jeff Grayzel won his special election over his Republican opponent, also.

Those special elections were between members of opposing parties. “If another brawl is ordered by the court to settle the Karrow-Harcar matter, this would be the first time such an incident occurred in New Jersey,” continued the non-existent Mayor McPeters.

Meanwhile, back in real-life NJ, Karrow must definately understand the first rule of "Fight Club". The 911 tape of Karrow’s call to the police, had her stating that she wished "this whole incident dropped”. Harcar's real-life lawyer said he found such a statement "troubling".

More later as this surreal story continues.