Acting Governor Kim Guadagno “Giddy” and “Gleeful”.

The Lt. Governor was asked, “to tone down her enthusiasm” just a tad, while acting as governor, in Christie’s absence.

Acting Governor Kim Guadagno could hardly contain herself and was described as acting like a “pre-teen school girl meeting Zach Efron or Justin Beiber for the first time,” as she made several appointments to fill empty seats on state boards.

The state’s first Lt. Governor filled seats on the Governor’s Council on the Prevention of Developmental Disabilities, Middlesex County College Board of Trustees and the State Board of Mortuary Science.

“What do I do now?” asked Guadagno, as she giggled her way through signing off on the appointments —which had already been decided upon by Christie —-before he and his family left for Israel for five days.

Ms. Guadagno was somewhat unfamiliar with the authority of the Office of the Governor, having “never been given this much responsibly before,” noted one undisclosed State Street source.

A few days earlier, on Tuesday, Guadagno pressed the “power button” on what is expected to become one of the 10 most powerful academic supercomputers in the world at Rutgers University. The ceremony marked the opening of the Rutgers Discovery Informatics Institute (RDII), which will house the IBM supercomputer.

“This is just so super awesome—turning on a ‘super-duper’ computer!!,” giggled Guadagno. She even had her press staff ‘update her Facebook page’ to reflect her daily activities as Acting Guv: “I’m the Guv this week! Neat-o keen!”.

The Lt. Governor was asked, “to tone down her enthusiasm” just a tad, while acting as governor, in Christies absence.

“I’m sorry—I just don’t get to do this ‘governor-thing’ too much. This is just so cool,” shrieked Guadagno. To her credit, she did take a more somber tone when appointing the members of the State Board of Mortuary Science.

“I used my ‘serious look’ during that appointment,” noted the Acting Governor, “since they work with ‘death’ and ‘dying’ and stuff.”

April 4th, 2012: Christie Has Private Meeting with God To Compare Notes, Leadership Styles

In Exodus 3:14, “And God said unto Moses, I AM THAT I AM.”

Early last year, when questioned by reporters on his insulting and confrontational style, Chris Christie said, “But the fact of the matter is, This Is Who I Am!™, and this is who the people elected.”

Similar leadership style? Same personal points of view?

Christie is traveling in Israel, and the opportunity in a private meeting with Our Lord Thy God to “compare notes, leadership style, political points of view, and other various things that came up at the Wailing Wall.

Christie’s Israel visit could raise speculation that he is positioning himself for a future run, and his trip will be watched by Democrats and Republicans alike.

Israel is a popular stop for American politicians on the rise seeking to bolster their international credibility while also appealing to Jewish constituents.

Speaking to reporters after visiting the Western Wall, the holiest site where Jews can pray, located in the disputed Old City of Jerusalem, Christie played down any political significance of his trip, calling it a chance for him and his family to see the country.

“I came here for one reason and one reason only: to have a private meeting with The Big Guy Himself, and share leadership notes,” shared Christie. The governor said the two had a “really good and fruitful discussion” about regional issues, including Iran’s disputed nuclear program and expanding trade between Heaven and New Jersey. “He’s been around for like forever, and really knows His Stuff.”

Christie is traveling with his family and a delegation of 13 business and religious leaders. While in Israel, he plans to tour a pharmaceutical facility with an interest in expanding to the U.S., participate in a business round-table and visit a school.

“Oh, also Mary Pat and I will go to a great pizza place in Jerusalem on Jaffa Street, that Netanyahu told me has pizza as good as anything at the Jersey Shore.”

New Jersey Plan to Make Money With Formula One Grand Prix: “Charge Tolls”.

“E-Z Pass is a remarkable toll collection technology that makes race car driving more convenient.”

Governor Chris Christie announced this week that in 2013, there will be a Formula 1 Grand Prix race in New Jersey. The plan includes the cooperation of the mayors of Weehawken and West New York, two cities geographically involved in the circuit’s layout.

However Mayors Richard F. Turner of Weehawken and Felix Roque of West New York, both had the same concern, “How does New Jersey make money on this?”

“Tolls. And the sale of E-Z Pass to Formula One Grand Prix top drivers, of course. We have already received E-Z Pass applications from Ferrari’s Felipe Massa, and Mercedes GP star Michael Schumacher, as well as several other top drivers,” added Christie.

“E-Z Pass is a remarkable toll collection technology that makes race car driving more convenient, and will help Formula One drivers save money through discount plans offered by many toll facilities. It will reduce traffic congestion for everyone in the race,” noted New Jersey E-Z Pass Director Jorge Ramon Caceres.

Both Massa and Schumacher expressed concern that, “Having to stop every eight miles or so, and find change to pay a toll,” might impede their ability to be competitive.

“New Jersey remains a leader in hosting all types of national and international sporting events,” Governor Christie said, adding the Grand Prix of America to a list that includes last winter’s NCAA tournament and the Super Bowl in 2014. “While some pure race drivers will opt out of E-Z Pass , it is there for those drivers who wish to take advantage of the time savings it provides.”

World champion Sebastian Vettel, was equally impressed with the challenge of racing in New Jersey.

“It’s interesting, a good challenge,” said Vettel. “It’s very dusty to start with, but the track seems like it will be a new type of challenge…especially the toll lanes that give a lot of options to all the drivers. ‘Exact Change Only’. ‘E-Z Pass lanes Only’. ‘Cash Only’. Toll-operators in case drivers need directions. We’ll see a good race in 2013.”

Placing a race in New Jersey, on a 10-year contract, “will be one of the best decisions you ever made.” Gov. Christie also said he is interested in bringing NASCAR to the track

March 1st, 2011: Rep. Jon Runyun beats "Toaster Oven" in Jeopardy! Challenge

Republican New Jersey Rep. Jon Runyan was the sole competitor to beat the Sanyo SK-7W Toaster Oven (nicknamed "Toasty") in a mock Capitol Hill exhibition of "Jeopardy!" Monday night, beating out House Speaker John Boehner, Rep. Michelle Bachman (R.-MN), and Eric Cantor (R.-VA.), and Kevin McCarthy (CA-22). Cantor and Bachman scored no points at all: Cantor could not figure out how to use the buzzer system and Bachman looked into the wrong camera throughout the Jeopardy! Challenge. Sanyo hosted the Washington event -- a non-televised, informal game of Jeopardy -- to demonstrate the impact of kitchen technology on society, according to the Hill. "Toasty", Sanyo's interactive toaster-oven, is equipped with some of the most sophisticated heating coils in the world. "I am not surprised Toasty lost; it is not an American made product. A Black and Decker toaster oven would have been tougher," Runyan said, according to the Hill. Toasty was unable to answer a question about the Dred Scott Supreme Court decision, but Runyan knew the answer from his debate with former Congressman John Adler. "Luckily, I still had that answer written on my hand," shared Rep. Runyan. In other news, Gov. Christie told the Star-Ledger that he was upset that Charlie Sheen was "stealing my signature ranting and yelling bit. That is my bit, not his."

February 22, 2011: Gov. Christie to hold “Turn Back The Clock!” Counter-Rally with Republican electeds

As Charles Wowkanech, New Jersey State AFL-CIO President, joins a furious clan of Wisconsin workers who will travel to Trenton this Friday who say the time is now to rally for collective bargaining rights, Gov. Christie will hold a counter rally on the Statehouse steps with Wisconsin Republican Governor Scott Walker. Christie and Walker will be joined by dozens of other Republican elected officials from around the nation at their "Turn Back The Clock!" Rally. "The time is not 'Now'; the time is 'Then'. It is time to turn back the clocks," asserted Walker in a media release. Wisconsin Gov. Walker, who wishes to turn back the clock on public union labor's right to collective bargaining, will be joined onstage by New Jersey Congressman Chris Smith, who wishes to redefine the legal definition of rape, turning back the clock on the right to womens' productive freedom; Missouri State Sen. Jane Cunningham, who's introduced a bill to turn back the clock on child labor laws; and newly elected Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul, who earlier last year expressed his wish to turn back the clock on civil rights by declaring that the Civil Rights Act of 1964 was "unconstitutional". "This is who I am!™," began Gov. Christie with his now famous trademark phrIase. "Last year in New Jersey, and last November, the American people elected Republicans to turn back the clocks. To turn back the clocks on collective bargaining for unions. On environmental protection. On abortion rights. On child labor laws." Public workers say 'the time is now'. Well, we say the time is 'then'. Now is the time to turn back the clock to 'then'. At this rally, we will stand shoulder to shoulder in solidarity with our fellow Republican electeds across the nation and speak out to support their right to turn back the clocks.

January 24-28, 2011: That Was New Jersey News That Was!

* Congressman Jon Runyon of New Jersey's Third Congressional District:Rep. Runyon issued the following statement regarding President Obama's State of the Union address: "...first the president doesn't tell Congress who is coming from China, next none of the beer vendors at the speech ever made their way up to where I was sitting. And that was another thing, I have to sit next to "Democrats"---and the president used to many highfalutin' words. I mean--WTF?"

*N.J. bill aims to end nepotism at charter, public schools: "Though nepotism has been a way of life in some New Jersey school districts, there are signs that change may be coming," said State Sen. Randall "Randy" Stottlemyre (D-41). "This bill being considered by the state Assembly would prohibit the state's charter schools and 588 school districts from hiring staff who are related to the superintendent, a board member, personnel director, business administrator or the school district's attorney," added Middlesex County School Superintendent Martin "Marty" Stottlemyre. Woodbridge Township Superintendent John "Johnnyboy" Stottlemyre said "...the bill will not affect his school district because nepotism rules have been in place since at least 1992."

* Gov. Christie tells anti-abortion activists he is on their side during Statehouse rally: Gov. Chris Christie made brief remarks before hundreds who weathered bitter temperatures to mark the anniversary of the Supreme Court's decision in Roe v. Wade. Speaking for five minutes without a coat, Christie told the attendees that "every life is precious and a gift from God." In response, God issued the following statement: "First of all, I am a God of free will. Notice that I do not demand that People love Me or accept Me. I loved You first and allow You to make the choice to accept that love and to love Me back. Now that's Pro-Choice. Also, if you go outside in 0° weather, wear a coat for Me Sakes. You're the governor! First you go to Florida in a snowstorm--then you don't wear a coat when it's freezing out? What kind of example is that to set for New Jersey kids, huh?"

* North Hunterdon High teen breaks up mid-terms with disgusting smell:A 16-year-old Clinton Township boy faces disorderly charges for causing a disgusting smell in his classroom during mid-term exams at North Hunterdon High School. According to police, the teen was in class at North Hunterdon on Monday and asked to use the bathroom. The boy then took a carry-out style coffee mug with a screw-on cap with him to the nurses' office bathroom. The boy defecated in the mug, screwed the cap on, and returned to the classroom where he unscrewed the lid, and "this caused a disruption in the classroom," police said. The American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ) which focuses on constitutional law for conservative issues, has decided to "defend the boy's First Amendment right to express his views in any way he so chooses. This is like the Tinker case all over again... only

maybe we can call it the Stinker case...".

ing, I have to sit next to “Democrats”–––and the president used to many highfalutin’ words. I mean––WTF?”

*N.J. bill aims to end nepotism at charter, public schools: “Though nepotism has been a way of life in some New Jersey school districts, there are signs that change may be coming,” said State Sen. Randall “Randy” Stottlemyre (D-41). “This bill being considered by the state Assembly would prohibit the state’s charter schools and 588 school districts from hiring staff who are related to the superintendent, a board member, personnel director, business administrator or the school district’s attorney,” added Middlesex County School Superintendent Martin “Marty” Stottlemyre. Woodbridge Township Superintendent John “Johnnyboy” Stottlemyre said “…the bill will not affect his school district because nepotism rules have been in place since at least 1992.”

* Gov. Christie tells anti-abortion activists he is on their side during Statehouse rally: Gov. Chris Christie made brief remarks before hundreds who weathered bitter temperatures to mark the anniversary of the Supreme Court’s decision in Roe v. Wade. Speaking for five minutes without a coat, Christie told the attendees that "every life is precious and a gift from God." In response, God issued the following statement: “First of all, I am a God of free will. Notice that I do not demand that People love Me or accept Me. I loved You first and allow You to make the choice to accept that love and to love Me back. Now that's Pro-Choice. Also, if you go outside in 0° weather, wear a coat for Me Sakes. You’re the governor! First you go to Florida in a snowstorm––then you don't wear a coat when it's freezing out? What kind of example is that to set for New Jersey kids, huh?”

* North Hunterdon High teen breaks up mid-terms with disgusting smell: A 16-year-old Clinton Township boy faces disorderly charges for causing a disgusting smell in his classroom during mid-term exams at North Hunterdon High School. According to police, the teen was in class at North Hunterdon on Monday and asked to use the bathroom. The boy then took a carry-out style coffee mug with a screw-on cap with him to the nurses’ office bathroom. The boy defecated in the mug, screwed the cap on, and returned to the classroom where he unscrewed the lid, and “this caused a disruption in the classroom,” police said. The American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ) which focuses on constitutional law for conservative issues, has decided to “defend the boy’s First Amendment right to express his views in any way he so chooses. This is like the Tinker case all over again… only maybe we can call it the Stinker case…”.

Governor's plan to help Gannett Layoffs: "Create less news...a government about 'nothing'."

January 13th 2011:
Governor announces plan to deal with Gannett Newspapers Announced Layoff Plans:
"We plan to create less news. This will become a government about 'nothing'."

The Gannett Company, owners of the largest newspaper chain in the nation, announced staff layoffs in three daily New Jersey newspapers. The Gannett Company includes the Courier News in Somerville, the Home News Tribune of East Brunswick and the Daily Record in Morris County. Ninety-nine staffers at the papers will have to apply for 53 remaining positions which amounts to the elimination of approximately half the editorial staff. Gannett has sought assistance from the Math Department at Rutgers to determine exactly "what percentage of 99 is 53."

The Gannett Company, seeking assistance from the governor's office and the people of New Jersey, issued a request through the New Jersey Business Action Center for the governor to issue an Executive Order requiring "elected officials around the state to do less, maintain a lower rate of activity by at least 50%, and do 'less with less'."

The mayor of a small central New Jersey town, who wish to remain anonymous, said, "For years they've been asking us to do more with less; for a while we had to do less with more; and now they're asking us to do less with less-it's all getting very confusing."

"If we can count on cooperation of New Jersey's state senators, assemblyman, mayors, and locally elected officials to create less news by doing less in their communities, we can ride the wave of this recession by using fewer reporters to report the less news created," said George H. White, Executive Director of the New Jersey Press Association.

Both Gov. Christie and Senate President Steve Sweeney were ready to do their part: "... I am ready to do less about the financial problems facing New Jersey small towns and create less news," said the governor in a statement issued by spokesman Michael Drewniak.

"I am also ready to continue abstaining on important issues coming before the state Senate in order to create less news," said Senate President Sweeney. "Working together we can do less and less, so as to help the New Jersey newspaper industry to survive this recession."

In other news, JWoww of MTV's "Jersey Shore" (real name Jenni Farley) filed an Order To Show Cause in court in a bid to stop her former lover and manager from cashing in on nude pictures he had taken of her.

"I'd hate for such photos to destroy my pristine image," said JWoww.

December 30th, 2010: News Shocker: New Jersey To Eliminate Offices Of Governor And Lieutenant Governor

December 30th, 2010: News Shocker: New Jersey To Eliminate Offices Of Governor And Lieutenant Governor

State Sen. Ray Lesniak is initiating legislation in the Senate that would eliminate the office of Lieutenant Governor and Governor, considering that “the state is working very well while Gov. Christie is in Disneyworld and Lieutenant Governor is in Mexico.”

Two years ago voters in New Jersey approved the creation of the lieutenant governor position as an amendment to the New Jersey Constitution, and Republican Kim Guadagno was elected.

Amongst the powers designated to the lieutenant governor under Article V, Section I, paragraph 6 of the New Jersey state Constitution, is the requirement that the lieutenant governor “…stand directly behind the current governor, smiling, as he or she signs or vetoes bills; leave the state of New Jersey to go on vacation when the governor does; cut ribbons at the openings of state parks or the closing of tunnels or bridges…”.

But not everyone thinks that Kim Guadagno is doing her job.

"We clearly made a mistake if we created the office lieutenant governor and wasted money if the lieutenant governor is not going to be here when the governor is out of state," said state Sen. Raymond Lesniak (D-Union). "It's being handled very well by Sen. Sweeney, but you have to really question the purpose of the office."

And a noted New Jersey academic questions the need for the transition of power, and maybe even the need for is the office of governor itself. “The requirement, in an era of instant communication, only adds to political complications when passing down powers”, said Joseph Marbach, a Seton Hall University political science professor. "It's really an antiquated policy. He's not out of contact with people, particularly because of technology," said Marbach, who is dean of the College of Arts and Sciences. "This is a concept that is 200 years old and really doesn't make a lot of sense in the modern era."

In an era of blackberries, e-mail, cell phones and instantaneous communication––does it really matter if we have a governor at all? Maybe it is possible to outsource the needs of our executive branch to a state whose governor does not make as much as Christie does. Christie is amongst the highest paid governors in the nation at $170,000.

“When people run for governor, they know what the salary is,” said Ingrid Reed, political scientist at Rutgers University in New Jersey. “They’re not doing it for the money. They’re doing it for the power to do good deeds.”

“We’re trying to cut back in government spending, maybe it’s time to outsource the role of the governor to a state like Maine, where the governor is paid just $70,000. Or maybe outsource to Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who takes no salary at all. We can text message our needs to Arnold, and save a great deal of money in the process,” added Lesniak.

In other news, in Florida Gov. Christie was on YouTube yelling at Donald Duck declaring that he was “...unfit to teach values to our children because he wears no pants when he goes out in public.”

No News Corp Is Good News Corp

10.25.10: No News Corp Is Good News Corp

As many people in New Jersey know, the Fox channel has been off the air in many homes because its parent company News Corp. and Cablevision have not been able to agree on payment issues. That has voters turning to elected officials and candidates to see what they are doing to make Fox available.

Scott Sipprelle originally misheard what the problem is and thought that it was "lox" that was unavailable. He immediately held a press conference in East Brunswick condemning Rush Holt and his liberal policies for impeding small businesses from providing a sufficient supply of smoked salmon.

Gov. Chris Christie went right to the microphones blaming President Obama and Washington bureaucrats for impeding the airing of Fox. When Christie was then told that it’s a dispute between two private companies, he quickly hired Bret Schundler as a telecommunications czar and then immediately fired him.

Aides to Senate President Steve Sweeney indicated that it wasn’t a top priority for him, considering that Sweeney’s television programs are preselected by Chris Christie. “One of Christie’s people comes over to my house on the weekends and sets up my DVR for the whole week,” Sweeney said. “It’s so nice not having to make decisions about what to watch.”

Senator Michael Doherty quickly became the public face of the TEA Party movement, otherwise known as the Television Enough Already group. “None of the Founding Fathers ever watched television,” Doherty said while encouraging people to instead read the Federalist Papers at night by candlelight.

Lt. Governor Kim Guadagno came out with the following statement: “Hi, I’m Kim Guadagno and I’m the Lieutenant Governor of New Jersey.”

Assembly Speaker Sheila Oliver was originally on Cablevision’s side, but then she found out that Joe DiVincenzo likes watching reruns of “The Office” in the evening so she switched her position to backing Fox.

Anna Little indicated that Fox would have been able to pay the higher fees that Cablevision wants if “Fox didn’t have to pay for the exorbitant medical bills for its employees that Obamacare mandates thanks to Frank Pallone.”

Here’s hoping we can get this problem resolved quickly before the NJEA starts to get blamed.

Gov. Ted Strickland of Ohio proclaims “Bret Schundler Day”

“Today is a day that is stupendous, for all of Ohio–––and all its descendants,” announced Gov. Ted Strickland in proclaiming today, September 3, officially “Bret Schundler Day” in the Buckeye State.

The former education commissioner of the state of New Jersey may be reviled in the Garden State, but in Ohio he is a hero to the several hundred thousand children of the Ohio school system.

Last week, because of the actions of Schundler, Ohio will receive $400 million from the Obama administration to improve schools. “Screw Justin Bieber,” said 11-year-old Jessica Lynn Grant of Columbus, Ohio. “Mr. Schundler is my new hero––because of him we don't have to lose cheerleading, or after school lacrosse. He's cool.”

The U.S. Department of Education announced that Ohio was among nine states and the District of Columbia that will receive funding in the second round of the $4.35 billion “Race to the Top” competition. Other winners include Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Maryland, Massachusetts, New York, North Carolina and Rhode Island.

A principal from a middle school in Dayton, Ohio––who wished to remain anonymous––had a similar opinion: “… the schools here usually suck. But Mr. Schundler's actions will allow our schools to suck just a little bit less this year. And I don't have to give up my raise or vacation.”

The governor continued reading from the proclamation he had just signed:

“Whereas Bret Schundler has long been known as having a commitment to the education of the children of Ohio and;

Whereas it was his actions alone that enabled Ohio to finish 10th in the
“Race to the Top” federal funding for education competition and;

Whereas his actions enabled the Buckeye State to receive $400 million to help hire teachers, provide scholarships for students, and keep our schools open;

Therefore, it is in great recognition of the fine contribution Bret Schundler has made to the state of Ohio for all of our students and teachers; I proclaim today September 3, 2010 “Bret Schundler Day”.

“Schundler really helped bring bucks to the Buckeye state," finished the governor with a little smirk.Gov. Christie's office in New Jersey could not be reached for comment.

The Cost of Incompetence

Candidate Chris Christie made a point over and over again about his fight against corruption in New Jersey government as US attorney. And Gov. Chris Christie made it a point to vilify, bully, and denigrate the teachers of the NJEA.

He even made a joke about it when questioned by Star-Ledger reporter Tom Moran. Doesn't seem quite as funny now, does the governor Christie?

• Gov. Chris Christie asked the teachers in New Jersey to give up their pay raises.
• Gov. Chris Christie asked New Jersey voters last April to vote against their local school budgets.
• Gov. Chris Christie took a hard stand against the NJEA and all that organization did for the past who knows how many years to make New Jersey schools the best schools in the country.

And what did Chris Christie give back for all he asked? Incompetence.

$400 million. For that same amount of money, the following could have been provided:

5200 Elementary School Teachers for One Year.

Or 44,600 Head Start Slots for Children for One Year.

Or the 33,706 University Scholarships for High School Students for One Year.

So Gov. Christie, when Tom Moran asks you about your administration's incompetence and what that means for the citizens of New Jersey, are you going to laugh about that, too?

March 17th, 2010 The Day New Jersey Stood Still

March 17th, 2010 The Day New Jersey Stood Still

It was like the plot from the 1950s science fiction movie: An alien (first Republican elected state-wide in very Blue New Jersey in 12 years) with his mighty robot (Big Budget Ax) land their spacecraft in State Capital Trenton. We need to say, "Klaatu barada nikto!" before it's too late.

They bring an important message to the State that he wishes to tell to representatives of the entire State. However, communication turns out to be difficult, so, after learning something about the natives, he decides on an alternative approach. He lives amongst us, and he reveals himself, along with the news that Big Budget Ax is a member of a race of super-robot enforcers invented to keep the budget of the State in check--- that will destroy the State if provoked.

Some of the major proposals in Republican Un-Governor Chris Christie's 2011 budget:

Education:

— Reduces state aid to primary and secondary K-12 schools by $820 million. Schools will lose up to 5 percent of their budgets. Districts where state aid is less than 5 percent will lose all that aid.

— Reduces state aid to colleges and universities by $175 million; eliminates aid to independent universities.

Property Taxes:

— Eliminates rebates for everyone in 2010.

— Gives reduced rebates to senior citizens, the disabled and low-income wage earners in April of 2011.

— Allows no one additional to join the "senior freeze" program, which lets low-income senior and disabled citizens lock in their property tax rates when they enroll.

— Proposes that rebate checks be converted to automatic property tax credits.

— Proposes that a 2.5 percent cap on property taxes be enacted for towns and schools. If towns or schools want to exceed the cap, they must get voter approval.

Income Taxes:

— Reduces the state tax credit for lower-income workers known as the Earned Income Tax Credit to 20 percent from 25 percent of the federal benefits. The eligibility would remain the same, but the credit would be lower.

Health Care:

— As of July 1, allows no more adults can enroll in the NJ FamilyCare program. The program offers free or subsidized health insurance coverage to low-income children and their parents.

— Closes two state-run hospitals, Hagedorn Psychiatric Hospital in Glen Gardner — one of four such state-run facilities in the state — and Vineland-West Hospital.

Layoffs:

— Approximately 1,300 state workers will face layoffs beginning in January. It is unclear how many of those are union workers and when the layoffs will occur.

Pensions:

— Skips a $3 billion pension payment to a system that is already underfunded by $46 billion.

March 14, 2010 Governor Christie Cuts The Day to Just 23 Hours

Governor Christie Cuts The Day to Just 23 Hours

In yet another Executive Order sure to rile clock and calendar makers, Governor Chris Christie issued Executive Order 247, cutting back an hour a day from the days in New Jersey.

“This will save New Jersey residents 365 hours every year, and at least $7.25 per hour per resident ----roughly a total of $23,067,361,250.00 for our state coffers. That’s a lot, I think,” said the spokesman for the governor.

Democratic legislative leadership vowed to request the New Jersey Supreme Court to issue a stay to the Executive Order 247, and have the “Order only effect just Sunday, March 14,” and “to get the hour back by the fall in November.” This order particularly irked the Democratic leadership because of the governor signing the order to take place "between 2AM and 3AM" Sunday morning, "while New Jersey residents slept".

EXECUTIVE ORDER NO. 247

WHEREAS, the State of New Jersey (“State”) is confronting an unprecedented temporal crisis affecting all levels of government; and

WHEREAS, actual and anticipated time spent and utilized by the State continue to fall far below the amounts estimated in the Temporal Year 2010

NOW, THEREFORE, I, CHRIS CHRISTIE, Governor of the State of New Jersey, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and by the Statutes of this State, do hereby ORDER and DIRECT:

That ONE-HOUR per day shall be removed from the days in New Jersey, commencing Sunday, March 14th, 2009.

Flemingtoon* 11.24.09 *All dialogue mostly guaranteed almost verbatim.

I have a Blackberry device that I am not completely thrilled with. It’s clunky and not intuitive like an IPhone, which I would rather have. In fact, the regular message on all my Blackberry emails is “I have a Verizon Blackberry, but I would rather have an IPhone.”

While the folks at Verizon were not too happy about that, it’s my phone and I will send out the message that I want.

Anyway, the email function on the Blackberry has this spelling correction feature -- Presumptive Spelling. When generating a text or email message, I often use abbreviations. The Presumptive Spelling function “thinks” that I am misspelling certain words and will automatically change the words to what it thinks it should be.

The other day I get an email from a local Democrat in Flemington, and she [let’s go with a generic name of “Shirley”] asks me the following question:

“My husband and I were appalled to find out that State Senators and Assemblymen can still practice as lawyers when they get elected. Can Chris Christie still be a lawyer when he becomes governor? We’d thought you might know.”

So, I answered her on my Blackberry:

Shirley,

“When he becomes Governor, Christie will still be atty.” [I abbreviated ‘attorney’ as ‘atty’.]

Her answer to me seemed odd, at the time: “Not funny. Stop the jokes.”

Upon further investigation, I made a discovery.

The only thing is the Presumptive Spelling function ‘corrected’ the ‘atty’ abbreviation for me, and unbeknownst to me, I hit SEND.

The correction produced:

“When he becomes Governor, Christie will still be fatty.”

Makes me wonder what other embarrassing ‘corrections’ lurk in the Presumptive Spelling function. Now, I need to figure how to turn it off.

Recent crime reports have indicated two important trends in New Jersey: Violent crime is down; however, non-violent crime is up. Perhaps this second trend is directly attributable to the recently discovered driving record of gubernatorial candidate Chris Christie.

Mr. Christie has worked all summer trying to score points in the race for governor. And racing he has been doing: Between 1985 and 2000 Christie was found guilty on 10 tickets totaling 25 points on his license. Wonder what HIS insurance rates must be? Oh, I forgot ----at times, he has had no insurance, like at his stop in Lambertville.

So, that got me thinking---Christie is asking us to let him drive the New Jersey bus. But, would you trust him with your kids on a school bus? Is his driving record good enough for him to get a job driving a school bus in New Jersey?

Let’s see…if you go online, and Google ‘school bus driver’, you get hundreds of hits. So, there are plenty of jobs out there. I found one school in Old Bridge, with the following requirements:

• Current driver's license required with no more that 3 moving violations in past three years (no alcohol or drug related convictions)
• CPR and First Aid certification required
• 2+ years of experience transporting children highly desirable.

Christie has 25 points from 1985 to 2000----but none in the past three years. So, he is OK, there.

Don’t know if he is “CPR and First Aid certification required”. But when he got into an accident with a motorcycle rider, the rider did end up in the hospital. So, maybe Christie is not “CPR and First Aid certified”.

And finally, he does have experience driving kids around to ball games, etc. Thumbs up there.

When Christie down to give testimony to Congress over the summer, he left early because he had to take the train back. Perhaps he could have stayed longer had he driven down to DC. But with his driving record, maybe taking Amtrak was a good idea.

So, the jury is still out. Would you trust Chris Christie driving your kids in a school bus in the morning?

Corzine is ready to go

It's more than official: Christie vs Governor Corzine.

I was blogging at the Corzine for Governor event tonight, and got to see first hand who is the team with the governor.

Labor. LBGT folks. College students. Seniors. The African-American community. The Latino community. All working on parallel tracks to re-elect Jon Corzine.

No wounds to heal; no need to attend a "united front" breakfast----Corzine campaign hits the ground running. Tonight the VP was in town. I am sure that President Obama will visit before the campaign is over.

On Christie's side, I am sure that he will have Lonegan out there campaigning for him. Good luck with that. As well presidential losers Mitt Romney and Rudy Giuliani.

Important note: No pro-life/anti-choice candidate has won state-wide in New Jersey in more than two decades. Chris Christie may have coasted on the coat tails of US attorney reputation to the nomination---but now he has to run in the issues.

And his primary run forced him to the right on most issues. He has declared his anti-choice position, and his opposition to taking any federal stimulus dollars----in spite of the fact that NJ sends more dollars to Washington than just about any other state.

So, over the next 153 days until November election---the choice is clear.

...Pants on Fire

Though Chris Christie has called the practice "pension abuse," the AP is reporting that one of his top political advisers and fundraisers, John Inglesino, has a state job for $3,000 -- the minimum needed to remain in New Jersey's pension system.

He got the job from State Sen. Joe Pennacchio the day after his term as freeholder ended, when he would have no longer been earning credit towards a pension. It also happens that Inglesino's firm got one of Christie's no-bid contracts while he was US Attorney.

Christie had an interview scheduled with the AP yesterday, but he "abruptly canceled" it after the news broke.

Now State Senator Joe Vitale (see below for the press release he issued today) is asking Christie to call for the release of any documents that demonstrate the work Inglesino has done. "We all deserve to see exactly what this “political adviser” did in his state taxpayer funded job that allowed him to pad his pension."

This was Christie's take on pension padding a few months back: "The pension abuse is terrible,'' Christie said in a March interview on New Jersey 101.5. "I mean, let's face it. Part-time employees, people making $5,000 on somebody's staff being eligible for a pension? Being eligible for health benefits. On our dime? I would end it.''

These are his close friends. If he wants to end the pension abuse, he can start with them.

Links:
AP: Christie campaign adviser on N.J. state pension rolls
AP: Christie ducks questions on adviser's pension

For what it's worth, it wouldn't be the first time Christie's words don't match his actions.

Niiiiice!

If only more like people Trout endorsed Christie….

At another time and another place, maybe even in an alternate universe of New Jersey, Chris Christie the US Attorney would have been prosecuting this person. But the time, place and date is now, New Jersey in the current universe and the Republican gubernatorial primary.

So, alas, he is Chris Christie the gubernatorial candidate, and this person endorses him instead. Wonder what he has to say about that. We emailed but have yet to hear back.

The person is Sheriff Deborah Trout of Hunterdon County. And in a recent letter to the Hunterdon County Democrat [the newspaper of record, not the political party] she endorsed Christie for governor. Trout said that she “was honored to join with Republican sheriffs statewide to endorse” Christie for governor. She cited his record of fighting corruption and putting “corrupt politicians” in jail. Finally, Trout made note that Christie will work with law enforcement officials to clean up out cities, and reform Trenton.

If he wants to do all that and more, maybe he can start with the Hunterdon sheriff’s office itself.

Trout has flouted the law so many times that an independent recall effort was kicked off earlier this year. And her office was raided by the Hunterdon County prosecutor’s office, too. Here are just some of the reasons why Trout faces such problems...

• Trout endangered public safety through her inept Background Checks: Trout appointed several people to her staff who have been charged with lying about their backgrounds on their employment applications. One employee was stripped of his license to carry a weapon and was barred from public employment in the State of NJ.

• She violated citizens' 1st Amendments Rights: Sheriff Trout and Undersheriff Mike Russo sent emails to a Moderator of a local online forum demanding that he remove posts criticizing the Sheriff's Office, informing him that "several individuals that post on this forum are currently under investigation for Criminal and Civil Prosecution".

• She required her employees to sign “Loyalty Oaths" promising not to run against her when she runs for re-election.

We are sure that Chris Christie is damn proud to have Trout on Team Christie.

Chris Christie and Warrantless Seraches.

Our Mensch of The Week this week goes to Deborah Jacobs and the fine folks at the ACLU for reporting that Chris Christie, while US Attorney---apparently taking his lead from the Bush Admnistration----approved the use of cell phone tracking without warrants for probable cause.

What did Chris Christie have to say?

"There was no policy in place that said to us you have to get a search warrant. Chris Christie wasn’t sitting around wondering where everyone was."

Well, yeah---there is a 'policy in place'!

It's called the US Constitution. Brought to you by the fine folks at the 1787 convention. Here's the link to it online. And you can check it out in Washington, too----now that Bush-Cheney-Rove et all are out of there, and it's back in style.

And I think it's funny that Christie referred to himself in the third person, like the 'Jimmy' character on Seinfeld....

Happy New Year

Happy New Year! This year will certainly be a challenging one for the Garden State as we march towards a year in which there will be a legislative and gubernatorial election. Buzz being what buzz is, as this is written, there are just a few folks running [literally and figuratively] on the Republican side.

There is perennial candidate Steve Lonegan of Americans for Prosperity who stands for everything libertarian, capitalist, and 'small government'.

There's Richard Merkt, who has served in the New Jersey General Assembly since 1998, where he represents the 25th legislative district. He is the one who has pledged to "jog" in all 566 towns, and has recently completed running in 300 of them.

Also, upping his New Jersey ante is Franklin Mayor Brian Levine, considering a run for governor himself. Now, I have met Brian before [I believe he is the brother of someone I know from Hunterdon County], and he seems like an affable guy, but his political eyes are a mite bigger than his political stomach, methinks.

But, what do I know. A year ago, I was at the New Jersey progressive political caucus standing with with the Bill Richardson supporters.

Of course, the real candidate everyone Republican is waiting for is my fellow Seton Hall Law grad Chris Christie. He should announce soon, if he is running---the filing deadline is mid-April, as usual. So, hmm.....

Hint: No one has booked www.christie4governor.com, www.christieforgovernor.com or www.christieforNewJersey.com or www.christie2008.com or even www.I'mChrisChristieandIamstilldecidingwhetherIamrunningforgovernor.com as of yet.

Happy New Year, and thanks Rob Tornoe for all the great NJ stuff in 2008.