Doherty on marriage equality: An Evil Plan

Mike Doherty thinks that marriage equality is an evil plan to divert the public's attention from 'real issues'. But first, the background story...

Assemblyman Michael Doherty’s call for a statewide vote on marriage equality brings to mind this verse, which Lee Hays credited to E.Y. "Yip" Harburg when he sang it on stage in 1980 at a Carnegie Hall Weavers reunion concert:

“Democracy gives us the choice of which machine to vote with.
Or choose which brand of razor blade we'd rather cut our throat with.”

Does Doherty really believe in democracy as the best way to settle such issues? I think not.

Of course, Doherty is the same guy who, when the issue is something he adamantly opposes, also opposes placing the issue on the ballot.

Like the bond issue on the ballot this fall for funding embryonic stem cell research. That issue Doherty voted against sending to ballot. Doherty and democracy? Go figure.

Seems kind of hypocritical to me, Mike.

But wait there’s more: According to this week’s Hunterdon County Democrat, Doherty believes that "gay rights advocates are using the [marriage equality] issue to divert law makers and the public from 'real issues like state debt, property taxes or the governor’s plan to sell the states transportation assets.' "

Huh?

Incredulously, he says. “Frankly I am sick and tired of having the issue shoved in my face every day and every way…It’s a constant agitation of society, much like former President Bill Clinton’s "Wag The Dog" antics to keep the heat off his personal indiscretions.”

Of course, two of the ‘antics’ of President Clinton’s that Doherty refers to were “Operation Desert Fox”, a bombing campaign in Iraq against military targets, and "Operation Infinite Reach", a pair of missile strikes against suspected terrorist targets in Sudan and Afghanistan. But I digress.

Yes, I am sure that the evil master plan of Steven Goldstein and Garden State Equality ---- is to divert the public’s attention from “state debt” and “property taxes”.

Yeah, that's the ticket. An evil master plan. I can see the GSE Exec Board meeting now…

Steven Goldstein: “OK, folks we need an evil master plan to divert public attention from ‘property taxes’ and ‘state debt’. Whaddaya got for me?

Exec Board Member # 1: How about we advocate for huggin' trees? People love trees. That should divert their attention.

Goldstein: Nope, it’s been done. The Sierra Club. What else?

Exec Board Member #2: How about we advocate for animal rights? People love those little kittens and puppies!

Goldstein: Not bad. But I think we need to involve 'humans'. What else you got? We need ideas, dammit…

Exec Board Member #3: I got it! They’ll fall for this one: We advocate for marriage equality. Gay marriage. And get this: We start out with “domestic partnership”. Then we move on to “civil unions”. Then we hit the public with “full fledge marriage equality”, when civil unions don't really work out.

Goldstein: Brilliant! Fabulous! That should keep the public attention off of “property taxes” and “state debt” for years! Mwa -hahaha! Mwa-hahaha! I'll call Corzine! Let’s get the ball rolling!

Mr. Doherty, If you were truly conservative, you’d support marriage equality.

After all, what is more conservatizing than allowing two people who love each other, two people who wish to form a bond and raise a family, two people in love who wish to put down roots in to their community, buy a house, pay property taxes, ----to be able to express that love in the form of a civil marriage?

The NJ Supreme Court has already laid the groundwork on the issue, and the legislature has spoken. And Mr. Doherty, as a legislator, you are bound to follow the law.

Marriage equality is a civil liberty. We don't 'vote' on civil liberties.

Every candidate has a silver punchline

I have been speaking on the topic of humor in politics for about fifteen years to the New Jersey State League of Municipalities. And I have been the keynote speaker at about 20 other state leagues and national conferences of elected officials. When humor is used appropriately, it can make important points, diffuse tension, bring new people to see your point of view ---and most importantly ----show your human side.

Sometimes politicos do very well on TV when trying to be funny. Some do not.

The 2008 candidates for president have been sort of funny in the debates. Sometimes there are planned ‘quips’. Sometimes spontaneous. But I am sure that with most of the candidates hitting The Daily Show, The Tonight Show, Letterman, Leno, Conan O’Brien ----they each have someone on their staff to write good one-liners or to consult with them on how to deliver a punch line. I was once even called on to help Jim Florio be funny at the New Jersey Legislative Correspondents Dinner.

Here are some of the better one-liners from recent appearances by the 2008 candidates from USA Today, that voters may use to decide who they support:

Sen. Joseph Biden, made short, funny work of a question about his propensity for verbal gaffes and verbosity in general.

"Can you reassure voters in this country that you would have the discipline you would need on the world stage?" moderator Brian Williams asked him at an MSNBC debate in April.

"Yes," Biden said. As it became clear that was his entire answer, the audience roared.

What do you pray for? Was asked of Senator Hillary Clinton, at a forum on faith: "Oh Lord, why can't you help me lose weight?"

John Edwards and the $400 haircut: The haircut was a private expense that was listed on a publicly disclosed campaign-spending report. The former North Carolina senator did damage control last month on NBC's The Tonight Show With Jay Leno. Asked why he and his wife, Elizabeth, eat at Wendy's on their wedding anniversary, Edwards said: "You can't spend money on food when you're spending money on haircuts"

Sen. Chris Dodd, is making pre-emptive cracks about his age (63) and late-in-life fatherhood (his daughters are 5 and 2). "I'm probably the only one who gets mailings from AARP and diaper services," he often says.

Barack Obama faces potential wariness about his name. He introduces the topic by describing his first run for office: People everywhere asked, "Where did you get this name, Barack Obama? They'd mispronounce it to me. They would call me Alabama or Yo-Mama, and I'd have to explain it was Obama; my father was from Kenya, from Africa; my mother was from Kansas."

Sometimes funny ads can help:

New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson has moved up to double-digits in Iowa polls since starting a series of ads called "Job Interview." Each is a skit with a crass interviewer and the bemused governor.

In one, the interviewer reviews the Democrat's résumé — congressman, U.S. energy secretary, United Nations ambassador, Nobel Peace Prize nominee — and chews food as he asks, "So, what makes you think you can be president?"

Even the Republicans try their hand at humor:

Mitt Romney: The Mormon faith, with its polygamous past, poses a similar challenge for Romney. He handled it this way at a St. Patrick's Day breakfast in 2005, when he was governor: "I believe marriage should be between a man and a woman … and a woman …and a woman."

Former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani pulled that off at a CNN debate last month when microphone problems interrupted his answer to a question about his differences with Catholic bishops. Told lightning was the culprit, he laughed and said: "For someone who went to parochial schools his whole life, this is a very frightening thing."

How long did God take to create the world? Was asked of Mike Huckabee, at a debate: "I don't know. I wasn't there."

And two old standards from both sides of the political aisle:

One classic was the fake telegram then-senator John F. Kennedy read from his father at the 1958 Gridiron Dinner in Washington: "Don't buy a single vote more than is necessary — I'll be damned if I'm going to pay for a landslide." With that, Kennedy defused allegations that his rich father was trying to buy him the 1960 election.

Reagan scored a similar coup regarding his age, 73, when he ran for re-election in 1984 against Walter Mondale, then 56. "I will not make age an issue of this campaign. I am not going to exploit, for political purposes, my opponent's youth and inexperience," Reagan said during a debate. Mondale laughed and the issue became moot.

Humor: A tool in the rights hands. A horrible mistake in others'.

"Congress Commutes Bush Sentence on the American People, Saying 19 More Months ‘Is Excessive’ "

The Republicans running for President are showing what spineless, slimy, 'law & disorder' folks they really are. Here is what some of them had to say about President 28%’s (and falling) commutation of the sentence for Scooter Libby:

TV DA: Fred Thompson:
"I am very happy for Scooter Libby. I know that this is a great relief to him, his wife and children. While for a long time I have urged a pardon for Scooter, I respect the President's decision.”

Former real-life Federal Prosecutor Rudy Giuliani:
“After evaluating the facts, the President came to a reasonable decision and I believe the decision was correct."

Clue to Rudy: This is a president who has no idea what the ‘facts’ are any day of the week. Obviously, neither one these former DAs, real or imagined, have any idea what real “Law & Order” is. They are both equally clueless.

The Democratic candidates were a bit more on target:

"This is exactly the kind of politics we must change so we can begin restoring the American people's faith in a government that puts the country's progress ahead of the bitter partisanship of recent years." - Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill.

"This commutation sends the clear signal that in this administration, cronyism and ideology trump competence and justice." - Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton, D-N.Y.

"The arrogance of this administration's disdain for the law and its belief it operates with impunity are breathtaking. Will the president also commute the sentences of others who obstructed justice and lied to grand juries, or only those who act to protect President Bush and Vice President Cheney?"
- New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson

Here is the headline from the NY Times:

"Bush Commutes Libby Sentence, Saying 30 Months ‘Is Excessive’ "

Here is the headline I would like to see:

"Congress Commutes Bush Sentence on the American People, Saying 19 More Months ‘Is Excessive’ "

And the winner is…

I attended the debate of the Democratic candidates for President tonight at Howard University in DC. It is late and we just got back, so this will be short.

Subject matter for the first time was about race in America. Clearly, Hillary Clinton was the outstanding participant tonight. Her answers were sharp, clear and filled with good policy. A good portion of the audience was African-American, and included Dr. Cornell West and Rev. Al Sharpton. The moderator was Tavis Smiley, and the core subject matter was directly inspired by his book, “The Covenant” . Surprisingly, Barack Obama was not as compelling as one would think he would be in front of a mostly African-American crowd.

The best line of the evening came from Senator Chris Dodd of Connecticut, when Smiley cut the candidates’ time from one minute to just thirty seconds per question. “If I were Paris Hilton up here, you'd give a whole hour.”

The format ----which included questions on issues of concern to Black America as it relates to the Covenant with Black America book ---gave each candidate a very brief time to answer. Not the best format I thought for such a complex issue. Poor sound, along with too brief a time to answer the questions posed, made for a frustrating debate.

However, I discovered the real winner of tonight’s debate:
The Democratic Party.

Any of these candidates ---with the possible exception of Mike Gravel---is better than any of the Repubs. Including unannounced candidates Fred Thompson, Newt Gingrich or Mike Bloomberg.

So, bring it on. We are ready to win no matter which Democrat is nominated, and no matter who is the Repub opponent.

I, Robo-call

"Hello, this is Bill Clinton. I am supporting Democrat Melvin Smendrovich for Borough Council in Jerseytown because Melvin shares my values on the 'kitchen table' issues that...."

"Hey folks this is Joe Piscopo. We both know that New Jersey needs Republican Petey McPeters to be the next governor. He'll work hard everyday to...."

We've all received the dreaded robo-calls come election time. Automated phone canvassing calls that come day and night. They come with increasing frequency as we get closer and closer to the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November.

They block our phone service. They are annoying, coming at the most inconvenient time. Dinner. In the shower. During love making. However, they serve a purpose of re-minding voters over and over again to support Melvin in his race for Jerseytown Borough Council. That Melvin is the best person for the job. If Bill Clinton can take the time out of his busy day to call you [albeit automatically], then Melvin is the person you should support.

Unfortunately for the hapless Jerseytown resident, robo-calls are a part of campaigns because they’re cheap and they work to election advantage. So, what if robo-calls tick off a voter or two? If they get your candidate elected, they will be part of the campaign strategy.

Legislative Effort in Trenton

There is an effort in Trenton to curtail robo-calls or ban them altogether. While such legislation may run afoul of the First Amendment, several states have enacted laws impacting the practice.

For guidance in dealing with this issue, perhaps Trenton should turn to science fiction writer Isaac Asimov. In his novels Asimov developed the following Three Laws of Robotics ----[most likely not written by a lawyer from NJ]:

1. A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey orders given to it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

These seem to be clear rules regarding what criteria the state legislature should use in adopting an anti-robo calls bill.

“No harm to a human being?”
Sounds good to me.

“Robots must obey orders”?
This will work just fine.

“A robot must protect its own existence”?
Well, maybe that one will get fixed in committee.

If you and your robot support such a bill, call your legislator's office over and over again----but wait until he or she is eating lunch or in the shower.

Governor's Gala raises a couple of mil

I arrived at the Governor's Gala at NJPAC last night pretty late. Most of the big names were already out the door, but they tell me the fund raising was a couple of million. That's very strong funding for Democrats this fall --who oppose this president, this war, support a pro-choice platform, and value the working families of New Jersey. Very impressive. Tip O'Neil said that money is the mother's milk of politics. And, until someone thinks of a better system---publicly funded elections, maybe ----it's what we have to get out our Democratic message in a democratic society.

On the other side of the aisle, the Repubs raised just 600K last week when Bush came in to Edison. Top Repubs, not wanting a picture with a guy who has a 28% approval rating in NJ, stayed away in big numbers.

Our guy President Clinton raised 2 million. Their 28% guy raised 600K. That's the fact, jack.